A persons’ demeanor can speak volumes. It’s said that more that half of all communication is derived from body language. It’s easy to spot the happy confident people in a room; they are usually the ones that have good posture, inviting smiles, and plenty of eye contact. The shy ones are usually slouched in a corner chair looking at their shoe laces. Which one are you?

Do people really notice?

Yes. People really notice. The problem with body language is it may not be communicating the message you want to send. I consider myself an avid people watcher. I notice posture, facial expression, hand gestures and eye contact. Whether I mean to or not I formulate decisions based on my interpretation of these signals as I consider what is being said. If you haven’t shown me enough eye contact I tend to think you’re hiding something or you’re out and out lying. If you’re posture is slouchy and your head is hung downward my thinking is you probably have some self esteem issues.

In my many years in telemarketing I taught my teams to imagine their prospects are sitting right across from them. I encouraged my sales force to stand up, use hand gestures and smile. Body language is important even over the phone. Give it a try sometime.

If you think you may be sending the wrong message with your body language it’s time for a tune up.

Sit UP!
Good posture is important for many reasons and can be a clear indicator of how you’re feeling about a situation. Keep your back and neck in a straight natural position and your shoulders relaxed. Avoid looking tense and rigid.

The EYE knows!
Proper eye contact tells a person you are listening. For some people this can be hard to master. If you’re in a group keep looking around making eye contact they will naturally do the same.

Uncross those arms and keep your hands out of your pockets!
Crossed arms or hands in the pockets send the message that you’re on the defensive or you have something to hide. It really makes a huge difference.

Give a nod!
When you nod as people are talking they know that you are hearing them whether you agree or not.

Use facial expressions!
If you tend to be a bit on the monotone side you’re probably not using facial expression. Try enunciating your words. Throw in a smile or raise the eye brows to punctuate a point. It’s inviting and people will want to continue the talk.

Monkey see monkey do!
An age old technique is to mirror the person you’re talking with. Now that doesn’t mean mimic them it means to use a similar hand gesture or pat on the shoulder. People find comfort in familiar things.

Remember good body language is one of the most important people skills you can learn. For some it comes naturally and for others it will take some practice. If you are struggling with this start watching those around you and make a conscience effort to take inventory on how people interact. It may take some practice but with some effort you can be on the right track in no time.

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